Neophyte  Mainiak

Stunning gabber production from Dutch mastersn bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb –  the cat have liked it so much he just ran up to the speakers and  across my keyboard…Neophyte’s usual mix of 909 and hoover sounds is perfected here with an expert build up of fist pumping noise over the 4.5 mins. I heard this on Radio 1 of all places when I got up at 4 in the morning the other night, and I ordered the album from HMV – maybe Neophyte will eventually get the huge profile they enjoy in Europe over here sometime. The last time I bought a Neophyte album I had to import from Holland for a small fortune and when it finally arrived they’d used one of my vocal samples on the first track, The Hardest Remake. I don’t mind the sampling but at least I could have got a freebie, eh, EH?

 Motorhead Motorhead

No Sleep ‘Til Hammersmith has got to be the greatest live album ever made, so by extension this has to be the best live track ever recorded…or maybe Overkill from the same album…or possibly Neophyte’s Always Hardcore, which doesn’t, um ,appear on a live album! I’ve been going through music by some my childhood sweetheart metal bands lately – Motorhead still rule for sure, you can truly feel the energy and sincerity in the music, and that never dates. Around ten years ago I was lucky enough to meet Lemmy and he was unlucky enough to meet me…I made a total knob of myself but I’m sure he’s forgotten by now and so should I. But it’s hard. I wrote a whole blog piece about it but it was so fucking miserable I had to ditch it.

Harrison Birtwistle &  David Harsent The Minotaur

OK this is an opera, but it must also be the most truly hardcore music I’ll be looking at today. No CD or download available, you’ll have to sit through all 2.5 hours on DVD or Blu Ray…not such a chore when the stark, monolithic like sets with teutonic lighting are beautifully shot and featuring scenes of cannibalism and rape as the Minotaur contemplates his own dual nature…the monstrous bull and the more monstrous human that lurks inside him, whilst his duplicitous assailants fuck each other over whilst innocents get gored to bits! The atmosphere is almost as crushingly miserable as when I think about the time I met Lemmy.

 Ultraviolence vs Beyonce Violent Single Ladies

This unofficial mash-up was on YouTube a while back but got scooped up in the Great Music Purges of 2011. An inspired idea, you will notice from superb production sound wasn’t done in hour on Traktor LE. In fact it is the work of Graeme Norgate, well known as soundtrack composer on multi-zillion seller N64 game Goldeneye and more recently for the audio design of multi zillion selling Crysis 2. I was lucky enough to go for a bite to eat with Graeme lately. He had a,um, Lemmy burger. Download the track here…

After several weeks of tinkering the new Ultraviolence website is ready to visit. Whilst TeamUVR.com was great in its day I wanted something markedly different as Ultraviolence gradually becomes a serious concern again, along with a snappy new URL. I went with a FLASH website courtesy of Wix so I could program it myself from scratch and update everything easily – and it is very easy indeed so I’d suggest anyone might enjoy having a play with a Wix template. Its taken ages to get everything on there, though and I’m still adding things and streamlining it – please let me know if you have any comments or suggestions concerning ease of use, content or anything else.

Where have I been?

I have posted a few things about my long term illness but to avoid any confusion or speculation I will be explicit. I had severe chest pains starting in late 2005 which lasted 3 months and were diagnosed as costochondritis – a painful swelling of chest tissue. The pain was aggravated under exercise or sudden movement of the chest as well as (seemingly) by stress and raising my voice– I spent most of the 3 months in bed, aside from a few things I had to do including several agonising gigs. The symptoms re-occurred mid-2006, again diagnosed as costochondritis and lasting around 3 months. This time I was more frustrated and attempted to “do” more, but ended up drinking alot of alcohol and putting on weight. The pain began again late 2006 and was this time accompanied by stomach pains, as wearing a torture tunic. Meantime, I had moved to Scotland where hospital appointments took up to six months. After many appointments and tests I was diagnosed as having oesophagitis – painful damage to the gullet caused by acid reflux – a kind of chronic heartburn. With appropriate (and some less appropriate) drugs the pain eased slightly, but was nowhere near going away as was expected. I moved back to England in late 2008 where a proper investigation of the pain was instigated. Although the pain was still there, I tested negative for oesophagitis. The options were that costochondritis (for which there is no straight test) had been the main source of pain all along (the oesophagitis being incidental) or that the pain from either ailment else had caused neural damage or any combination of the above. This takes us into 2009 and fortunately was gradually feeling better, and had started doing bits of cycling and taking an interest in music again. I therefore decided with the consultant from the entertainingly named Pain Clinic that the relief was sufficient not to go through further investigative procedures. There were however further symptoms of (definite) acid reflux, and (apparently unrelated) corneal erosion and to cap it off a spell of bone fusing in a toe leading to gout – not bad for someone who gave up the booze for three years!

What I am doing?

I have been completely healthy since October of last year so I decided should that continue for a year I’ll consider gigging again. I can’t contemplate gigging with the full on chest pain – the circumstances appear custom made to aggravate the symptoms and it is not something that would make for a great performance. DJing is much easier, though, and I could cope even if things went tits up. Following an enjoyable Eurostar jaunt to Belgium last December I have a serious interest in preparing and playing mixes for people, whereas in years gone by DJing was more a promotional tool.

Where am I going?

My first UK appearance for 5 years will be at Electrocide in Preston on the 6^th June – for full details check Dark-cide.com and the event’s Facebook page - also check the Electrocide jingle on Ultraviolence.co. I’ll be spinning around 90 mins of Ultraviolence familiar and new as well as cutting edge hardcore electronica from the artists I love. More dates will be tricking in so keep checking Ultraviolence.co or see the contacts page to get updates.

Also check out…

Music DJ Narcotic and Nevermind’s United States of Terror  is an extraordinary release recalling New York hardcore pioneers Disciples of Annihilation’s tunes of the 90’s, also on Industrial Strength Records. This keeps the same core elements of pounding high velocity 909 drums, short speed-metal guitar samples and distorted uber-aggressive vocals whilst sounding shockingly fresh – I think is may be down to the arrangement and the fact that DOA’s tracks were wrongly dismissed by many as “easy” music to make and so were copied only unsuccessfully, leaving the path clear for someone to pick up the mantle. Fifteen years on and here it is…

If the idea of beautifully composed images of burning oilfields set to classical music appeals to you then you’ll love Werner Herzog’s meisterwork Lessons of Darkness. I used to watch this all the time on VHS and it’s great to have the DVD, even if I had to import an R1 disc.

Another bargain Xbox indie game is Infinity Danger, a simple series of bullet hell battles fought against a series of randomly generated modular bosses. I clocked up over 5 hours on this and I reached world ranking 45 – forcing me to commit the sin of pride – not bad for 60p. Killer electronic speech flattering satisfying laser blasts, too.

Heaven Is Oblivion first appeared as the final track of the episodic Ultraviolence album Psycho Drama. Although, like most of the album, the subject matter was dark the track was upbeat and released as a single in the following year as it was believed by record label Earache, myself and several names in the music biz to have some mainstream crossover potential. (audio example)

All of the Psycho Drama album  was recorded at my home which I believe in retrospect to have resulted in some substandard vocal recording. However, around £9000 had been spent upgrading my home studio to a standard capable of producing the electronic sound I wanted and so there was no further money left for microphones and acoustic treatment or for hiring a commercial studio. There was however an additional budget for the single version and a recording was made during a day at Protocol Studios in London, with original vocalists Didi Goldhawk and D Quest. The Protocol mix was hurried on unfamiliar equipment and was rejected but the 24 track vocal recordings from the session were used for a new, shorter home version that would become the single, mixed on my Tascam M1600 desk. The 2011 version was recorded within a PC computer using Cubase 5. It is my opinion that mainstream DAWs are very similar to one another in nature and quality but differ in respect to interface, quirks and minor functions – in short I prefer Cubase 5 because I am used to it. I like to mix digitally although it took time to get used to after spending years with an analogue set up, where you would constantly ironing out imperfections and seeking complete separation and purity of sounds, where you might need to add “faults” or ” humanity” to a digital mix. Both domains have pluses and minuses and it would be folly to claim one to be “better” than the other.

The chorus section of Heaven Is Oblivion is loosely based on a triumphant four bar melody section from Beethoven’s 9th Symphony, with the more whimsical 4 bars, both appropriate to the subject matter. The simple backbone of the melody was originally created using an Emu Proteus 2 Orchestral module which was supplied with a bank of 128 sounds which were a mixture of synthesised and sample sounds suited to replicating classical music and cost around £800. Here it is replaced with the modern equivalent East West’s Symphonic Orchestra, one of many minorly different VST plug-ins on the marketplace  containing many gigabytes of orchestral samples.  It sells in various iterations, costing from around £100 for the budget “silver” version heard here – the multiple microphone placements and expressions are surplus to this kind of work. It is worth noting that although Heaven Is Oblivion may be heavily influenced by classical music it was not my intention to produce classical music cheaply by using electronics, but more to use electronics to create a new sound that would create the deep textures and resulting emotions possible with orchestral music. (audio example)

The biggest change  in creating music at home over the last 16 years has been, for me,  the physical size and monetary expense of the equipment, and no more extreme example of the latter can be found in this choir section. 16 years ago, in order to have usable choir samples, I had to buy an sampler with at least 8mb of RAM, in this case an Akai S2800 plus a 270MB hard drive all piling in at a whopping £3000. The actual choir sample CD, the decent Peter Sidilocheck’s Classical Choirs was a more reasonable £50. As I didn’t own a CD-ROM (noisy and unreliable) I had to play each sound into sampler from an external CD player.  For the remake I have used East West’s Symphonic Chiors, which weighs in at £300 and 40GB and will run on a modern domestic PC. Symphonic Choirs contains a “Wordbuilder” function whereby the virtual choir “sings” words entered into a text box by the user. Although the technology is still embryonic, sounding nothing like a real choir performing from a lyric sheet, I have used the function can garner some interesting hooks that hint at the message of the track, and the result is more interesting than the generic sampled choir of the 1996 mix. (audio example)

The original bland keyboard sound of the Roland JX1 is replaced by Camel Audio’s Alchemy VST synth, its morphing additive sounds are rather like saples that can be fully manipulated as synth sounds, lending itself well to distinct electronic orchestral sounds, as hear in this synth- wind preset. The arpeggiator sound of the finished track is also courtesy of Alchemy, with some automation of the morph control providing additional interest as well as a dramatic whoosh for the bridge sections. (audio example)

Some straight old skool synth to keep the sound pallet from straying into faux classical territory courtesy of Native Instrument’s Prophet 5 emulator, the Pro-53, replacing Oberheim’s ultra-phat but non-editable Matrix 1000. (audio example)

Plush layers and spot FX were provided by the S2800 which I have spiritually replicated using ReFx’s Nexus sample player. Nexus contains many expertly programmed, lush presets and I have been careful not to over-use it, as productions can quickly sound like a Nexus fest. Such temptations are not beyond the resistance of mainstream producers and you will hear Nexus recognisably in many chart productions. I have used Native Instruments Battery as a sample player, as I have no need for the extra functions (such as complex keyboard mapping) of their more extensive Kontact counterpart. Here it plays a short classical music sample with a little manipulation within Battery for an electronic feel. (audio example) Now we can hear all the chorus layers together, first raw (audio example) and then panned out with a little EQ and reverb. (audioexample)

I do not have the original vocal samples from Heaven Is Oblivion, so I decided to create something completely different using Image Line’s budget DAW Fruity Loops (now rebadged FL Studio) speech generator.  The sounds were manipulated within Battery and through Prosoniq’s classic (and discontinued) Orange Vocoder. I have lifted a single vocal sample from the original CD which adds a euphoric touch, used sparingly save for in the climax of the piece in the second bridge. I believe these vocals to be at least “as good” as those in the original track, so I have turned a limitation into an advantage – something essential when working within a limited budget.

Solid State Logics’s X-EQ is the only equaliser used in Heaven Is Oblivion S2. Firstly because using one type of EQ can gel the sound in the same way as an analogue mixing desk might, and also because X-EQ has a beautifully transparent sound that can also be automated and used for filter sweeps (as heard on the kick drum early in the finished track) – the filter sweep can also act as an EQ duck so you get a “two for the price of one” dramatic effect together with non-intrusive sound separation. The brilliant graphic interface thankfully makes no attempt to replicate traditional controls and also makes use of a spectrum analyser which can be seen in green behind the EQ curve. Careful to turn it off after use, though, as instances quickly gobble CPU power.

When mixing a traditional band  an aim would normally be to place the instruments into a convincing space. Reverb in electronic music is very different in that it is instead used to embellish and fatten sounds and to place them into a deliberately unworldly sound space. The artefacts associated with actual spaces are generally undesirable. The versatile sound of SSL X-Verb wins over convolution or plate emulations – again the modern GUI makes the usable presets easy to edit and wins out over old fashioned dials and pretend LED readouts. Most of the delays in the finished mix are also X-Verb.

The initial mix of Heaven Is Oblivion S2 runs at 2’40” and took around ten hours of programming to complete. It can be heard here. It is adequate in demonstrating the above points and was deliberately made in such a way as to allow for easy remixing – for instance a dubstep or hard trance version could be made by adding rhythms and only minimal changes to the core elements. However (as is often the case) I grew emotionally attached to the track as well as becoming curious as to what would be possible if it were extended to a full four minutes or so, so spent a further fifteen hours or so making what I consider to be a finished version – click here to listen to it. I feel it to be superior to the original from a technical point of view and possibly from an artistic one, as the increase in dynamics and sonic textures make for a more fulfilling listening experience. Of course, the new technology makes this much easier so on a level field I would say the new version is about “as good” as the ’96 version was fifteen years ago. It is unfortunate that the this music will not see a commercial release, but it was enjoyable to accomplish such a piece of music without feeling under pressure and I hope that Ultraviolence fans will appreciate hearing it free over the Internet. There are many more elements of the track that I haven’t had time to go into here – perhaps I will expand on this article at some point.

Links: Confetti Studios, Steinberg, East West, Native Instruments, Camel Audio, ReFx, Image Line, SSL, Earache Records

Click here to listen to this exclusive track. I was considering making a 7” single and even got as far as mocking up the electro-goat’s skull sleeve design with 80′s punk inspired “sticker”, but it isn’t really representative of the direction that I’m going in and the feedback I’ve had from people is often “where’s the vocals, then!?!”  I used it a while back as a demonstration when I was giving a guest lecture on music production techniques, as it was made quickly and so is simple enough to explain in an hour. However, in the same lecture I suggested to the students that storing up new music on your hard drive is pointless, so as it’s over a year old I’ve taken my own advise and am giving away the MP3. I may well rework it or chop it up for spare parts at some point, in the meantime crank it up and I hope you get as excited listening to it as I did making it…EEEEEELLLECCTRRONNIIKKKK!!!!! On second thoughts, you might break something…DEATH!!! DEATH!!! DEATH!!!

In my first public appearance since 2007 I’ll be DJing at Power of Bass, Ghent, Belgium on the 4th of December. Why Belgium? Well, Joep from PoB has been persuing me to do something for ages as some of my tracks are apparently quite big on the industrial scene over there. My health still isn’t always 100% so I’m not up to booking gigs, but I’d like to be out doing something and I enjoy DJing so there you go. I’ll be booking some dates in the UK for early next year.

I’ll probably be playing for an hour or so, some new material of mine, a few oldies and some new hardcore music that impressed me. In the meantime check out this PoB trailer…I’ll probably extend it into a full length track for the event.

Also check out…

Nick cave and Warren Ellis’ masterful White Lunar CD, featuring re-recordings of three of their recent soundtrack works, including The Assination of Jesse James…which got me into this, although I wasn’t keen on the plodding Oscarhunt of a film. Works as dark chillout music, from the coffee table to the knife rack…

Normally if I want to hear Mozart’s Requiem with fucked up hardcore beats I have to spend hours doing it myself, however Disease’s Divided But United (Project Industrial mix) does the job for me for the price of a download. I couldn’t find out anything about Disease, but you can try and buy this here.

I can’t stop watching the stunning blu-ray release of Italian horror classic Suspiria, well worth the hi-def upgrade from DVD with colours that punch and rip through the hyperreal blood flow. On a big screen the effect is better than you would have got in the intended format of a 1970s cinema  Goblin’s prog yet good soundtrack is one of the best of all time, but could have done with a remaster as it is rather undynamic and unintentionally distorted – very much like a 70′s cinema when you crank it…witch…WITCH…oh god I’ve got to see it again.

Indie games developer Pencel Game’s excellent Gerbil Physics is worth 60p and a couple of hours of any Xbox 360 owner’s time.  Reminiscent of Lemmings or Elephunk, manipulating boxes of rodents is a charming and gently taxing way to spend an afternoon.

My definition of a tough person would be one who would disregard their own suffering in order to relieve the suffering of another, or in the context of a sporting activity one who would be willing to undergo a more arduous training regime than a competitor in order to excel. I do not consider insensitivity to the suffering of others to be tough, whether this should manifest itself in areas such as politics, business, domestic violence or warfare.

The idea that the ability to reject people without emotion is an asset seems to have trickled from the business community into the mainstream in the last decade or so. Programmes such as The Apprentice or Dragon’s Den have seen the viewer invited to fantasise about a life spent exerting power over others whilst disregarding their feelings, and instil the idea that such insensitivity is the norm. The cruelty of such entertainment spectacles of Britain’s Got Talent or Over The Rainbow, where rejecting and upsetting children is accepted as part of a ritualised decision making process may be more traditional, but has never been more popular or been executed with such fervour. Whilst the above brain drainers may not be harmful in themselves, I believe they have contributed towards a climate whereby someone such as David Cameron can cast himself as the tough hero in what will be very difficult times for many, but is unlikely to affect the lifestyles of multi-millionaires such as himself.

Roll your sleeves up and rate for toughness...

It was common practice in the era for horror films to claim to be based on actual events, but the 1961 Hammer film “Devil Bear” had actual routes in police reports from 19th century Holland, where several families were successively the victims of abhorrent ritual slaughter. All were found to have at one stage to have owned an individually made Stief Bear, for whom they had all independantly chosen the name “Clufrie.”

Although a relatively low level Nazi, Sturmbannführer Dorent Bilger was ironically known as “The Ratcatcher” by his superiors for his ability to flush out resistance activists in Vichy France, often by taking their family members hostage, and publicly committing acts of sadistic mutilation, often ending in murder. Wanted for warcrimes, Bilger’s last confirmed sighting was in 1952 on the outskirts of Buenos Aires, although numerous unconfirmed reports have pointed towards Fido’s Pet Bazaar, Norwich, UK.

Pictured is one Scrait Kanes, of Birmingham , Alabama – Grand Wizard of the Klu Klux Klan from 1922 until in 1927 an accident whilst practicing for a demanding magic trick left him trapped in the form of a rattlesnake. Kanes attempted to remain in his role, even acting as the noose during a lynching. However, in a majority vote other Knights denounced his being as “unchristian” and sold him to Alabama Gulf Coast Zoo.  He died of starvation in 1931, after the curator refused his request to examine the bloodlines of the albino rats that were his food.

The Rovee's concise interface uses just three simple controls

As you’ll gather I’m a fan, so I suggest you head over to G200KG and grab yourself a copy.

Notoriety

Although a ban in the 21^st century may be something of an achievement, Googling either film title reveals that any outrage concerns the ban itself rather than the content the films. All news articles are short and evidently the writers don’t consider the subject important enough to watch the films or do any further research. There appear to have been very small outbursts in both the film’s countries of origin, but they seem to be the results of small scale marketing campaigns. Murder Set Pieces’ top claim to fame being several film labs’ refusal to print such a depraved work. 4/10

2009’s Japanese shocker Grotesque distinguishes itself by being the only subtitled horror film to be refused a certificate. Asian horror is normally left fully intact, although Ichi the Killer (2001) notoriously receiving 3m15s of cuts. It has traditionally been the BBFC’s view that the working classes are most likely to be affected by on-screen violence and unlikely to watch foreign language films. Then head James Ferman speaking in 1975 in reference to The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1972):

“It’s all right for you middle-class cineastes to see this film, but what would happen if a factory worker in Manchester happened to see it?”

BBFC must have thought Grotesque to be so shocking even posh folk what can read wood gettin scarred by that scary forin disk. 5/10

DVD editions

Despite the BBFC ban, the ownership, import or distribution of either film is in no way illegal, but all mainstream retailers follow BBFC guidelines and thus will not to stock uncertified material. The Dutch label Cinema Vault’s uncut edition of Murder Set Pieces is however readily available through eBay or Amazon resellers. The sleeve is rather misleading, as the zombie girl is from a dream sequence, but play the movie and the transfer from 35mm looks tremendous on a big telly, with imposing colour palette as the 5.1 soundtrack thumps, squleches and pierces in involving fashion. The movies’ apparently dubious morals, some production in-fighting and unguarded participants make for a riveting and humorous commentary track. The rare Frightfest edition has a poorer non-anamorphic picture but more extras.  Any other editions are heavily censored.  3/5

The proposed UK sleeve design was possibly never destined for the racks of HMV

Grotesque is harder to get hold of, with Malaysian label Keris Video releasing the only English subtitled version of the “unrated directors cut” – the only cut of the film – thus titled in a snipe at the marketing of Hostel (2005). It is possible to wade through the pirate editions to import it through eBay international sellers, but I went for US exploitation specialists Diabolikdvd.com who charge low P&P, accept Paypal and I received my DVD in a couple of days. Customs hassles are possible when importing extreme material, but the worst that can happen is confiscation and I’ve never had any problems at all. The outer box is nicely presented, with an embossed title, but pop the disc in the player and it’s all downhill from there with no extras, low bitrate picture, pixelated subtitles and compressed 2.0 sound. You might wonder why you didn’t save some time and watch it on Torrent instead. 1/5

(note – Diabolik are now selling a different R1 edition, but there are no clues as to its origins or content)

The Films

Murder Set Pieces’ troubled production sees cheap opening credits, with the producers credited under the names of leading Nazis. More questionable taste follows as monochrome 9/11 footage rolls. This could be taken as exploitive or a criticism of the media at the time of filming (2004) when the twin towers were seemingly falling in perpetuity on the current affairs programs. The Nazi theme is ongoing, and could be seen as prejudicial against Germans as the dumb main character reveals himself to be a teutonic Charles Manson quoting, body building, misogynist and serial killer of models and showgirls. Anyone wandering what a young Schwarzenegger might look like slaying sex workers with primary coloured lighting (heavily influenced by Dario Argento’s Suspiria (1977)) need look no further. Known only as The Photographer, when he slips into his native German he sounds suitably oppressive, whereas back in English he gives us such gems as;

“It’s ironic. Women suck blood out of men every day. But at the end of every month it leaks out!”

Director Nick Palumbo often uses a pig's mask to signify dehumanisation. Early in the film it is seen waiting in the torture chamber...ready?

Ironic, indeed as a parade of bloody comic book murders play out in the depths of an alternate neon vision of a twisted Las Vegas. The prolonged torture chamber sequences are the films’ most effective as The Photographer seethes and muses in front of his gagged victims and blood stained dolls about the evils of the world. Deft use of editing, and striking flash bulb images cohere the pictures into one powerful vision, and a true updating of the classic slashers of the 70s and early 1980s. Sleaze fans will also be glad to see Leatherface himself Gunnar Hanson play a big fat daughter pimping neo-Nazi gun trader.

Slight trouble in schlock paradise, though, as despite Sven Garrett putting in a genre classic performance in the lead role the other actors are unconvincing non-professionals from the suitably exploitative worlds of adult entertainment and stage school. A couple of poorly executed and irrelevant scenes appear to have been left in for reasons other than for the benefit of the end product. 8/10

Despite a lack of plot being cited by the BBFC as one reason for the ban, Grotesque’s contrite back story is a sweet and simple tale of the meeting of demure young man and woman, contrasted with the torture chamber in which most of the film takes place, as a Lector-esque classical music loving doctor subjects the bashful lovers to “unimaginable” torments, whilst the motif “would you die for me?” is often pondered, reminding one of Bram Stokers Dracula (1992). With most J-horror awash with unnecessary and tedious surreal sequences this is not afraid to nail it off at 72 minutes, and is all the better for it.

Another reason for the BBFC’s exception to the film manifests itself in an eight minute scene of multiple sexual abuses, at the climax of which the severely disabled heterosexual male victim performs the unlikely feet of shooting his jism several metres, after a job at the skilled hand of Dr Evil. The whole scene is more effective than it deserves due to some skilled acting and effective sound, and whilst rather it may be rather trying, some may suspect sick comedy. This view is borne out by the film’s pantomime conclusion. However, I believe the effect to be the result of a lack of focus and care that can be seen in confused mix of laughs, faux snuff and love story, although all the elements are entertaining enough in their own ways. Fans of pain polemics Martyrs (2008) and Audition (1999) may be find much to like, but this is not nearly as satisfying as the high standards set by either. 6/10

Shock and Gore

As modern movies these two in a fair fight against torture porn king The Passion of the Christ (2004). Although neither film can match Mel Gibson’s maniacal 126 minutes of designer flagellation and slow death, Murder Set Pieces has a pretty good pop, with much hyperreal blood flow courtesy of uber-gore specialists Toetag Pictures, who delight in showing us heavily stylised killing of women in and out of the designer lit torture chamber, with nice attention to detail on the blood stained chains and bones. Felatio from a dismembered head traditionally causes problems at the BBFC as well. The graphic child slaying is hard to watch and I find the use of child actors in this kind of material to be misjudged, as these sequences are either unconvincing or distract the viewer into worries for the actual children, although they are always unfounded as is the case here. 8/10

Grotesque’s signature slow burn torture is inspired by ‘80s faux-snuff originating Japanese Guinea Pig series. The doctor’s quest for carnal satisfaction through sadism knows only the bounds of a limited FX budget, and an eagerness for sexual torture that is at odds with an unwillingness to show genitailia, making for a confusing castration sequence. All is helped along by the decent acting during a variety of censor baiting amputations. A superior finger necklace is shown in all stages of construction. 6/10

Battle of the Chainsaws: The calm Dr Grotesque's use the saw as a surgical instrument may be novel, but Sven Garrett's lunatic weilding and a blistering use of sound just pips it for MSP

Soundtrack

Everything sounds as good as it looks with a superb variety of cues from Tangerine Dream inspired ethereal synth chords to neo-retro grinding and ripping reminiscent of old skool slasher scores. A bit of Goblin inspired prog rock even gets a look in. To its utmost credit it retains its own strong identity throughout, mostly down to the recurring reversed and delayed plucking of the eerie signature piece. Murder Set Pieces also features possibly celluloid’s first and last double lesbian strpiier razor slaying set to bangin’ EBM. 4/5

From the inappropriate slapstick tune of opening credits, Grotesque is punctuated by the annoying and dated use of musical irony. Some of the classical pieces are quite pleasant, such as Puccini during the rejuvenation segment, but the synthesised Elgar late in the film is shockingly poor in every possible aspect. The original atmospheres show clichéd but pleasing use of industrial scrapes augmenting terrified yelps of victims, with some reverberating big drum hits, whose simplicity suggest they are direct from sample libraries. A terrible 80s inspired power rock song accompanies the end credits. 1/5

Result

Murder Set Pieces uses its sexy production values to lure Grotesque back to its pad. Bludgeoned, hog tied from the ceiling and abused for weeks, its confused identity finishes it off as its uncaring makers abandon it to its fate. Outside the battle, both films remain obscurities worldwide, thought to be offensive but so little seen outside their target niche that they offend nobody. Aside from the censors at the BBFC, whom it might be possible to take seriously if they concentrated on their real job which is to provide a valuable age classification guide for parents and cinema goers, instead of indulging in ineffectual cuts and bans based upon inconclusive research, and their own sensibilities. Sensibilities which are evidently fragile and easily poked by warped fantastical works that are an escape from, rather than the cause of, the planet’s many actual problems.

About You Now by Sugababes (MP3 single download) Had New Order been born 20 years and had 3 soul kittens instead of Barney they’d have sounded like this. Mixed for just this kind of listening environment and sounding fabulous, with some tremendous synth drops and buzzes.

Classic comp, well worth tracking down

Ballz In Your Mouth by Neophyte (from Neophyte Records’ Action Must Be Taken First Compilation CD) The MP3 compression process reduces bass definition and while the Evoke doesn’t lack grunt for its size it struggles with the complex frequency clash in the low end of one of Neophyte’s many hardcore masterworks. Still gives me goose bumps in the sample breakdown, though, as Eazy E accuses Monica Lewinski of being a “fuckin’ ho” and Bill Clinton of being a “godamn pimp!”

Basic Instinct Main Theme (from Omen the Essential Jerry Goldsmith Film Collection CD) I’ve been getting more into Goldsmith’s work since enjoying the Omen triple CD soundtrack set, and rewatching the DVDs featuring informative interviews with the composer. One of his best other works is this short and playful theme from Paul “Robocop” Verhoven’s most childish of adult thrillers, featuring Sharon Stone as pretty killer Catherine Tramell.

End Credits by Vangelis (from Blade Runner OST CD) There’s kick-ass detail on this soundtrack when played the right system – a shame is that the radio simply isn’t big enough to present a cinematic soundstage.

Influenced by video nasties, my kitchen contains many torture instruments

Adulteress’ Punishment and Love With Fun by Riz Ortolani (Cannibal Holocaust OST CD) If the film didn’t make a vegetarian of you, it is quite possible to relive particular sections given a bloody steak and oversized knife. A beautiful score that translates surprisingly well.

Casino main theme by Georges Delerue (Casino OST CD) The second soundtrack to a film featuring Sharon Stone, this time indulging in some pretty killer acting as Ginger in Martin Scorsese’s top flight gangster epic. The film’s soundtrack clangs on and on with its 60s pop music mainstays until it becomes unnoticeable, then at an apt moment crack your heart open with this genius piece, in the same vain and rivalling Samuel Barber’s Adagio for Strings. Actually titled Théme de Camille, originally written for French film Contempt I keep on meaning to check out more of Deleue’s work.

C’mon Everybody by The Sex Pistols (The Great Rock n Roll Swindle CD) Swindle indeed, as this is Sid Vicious’ solo work and features no original members of Sex Pistols. And it never should have worked, he being a junkie managed by his loathsome girlfriend, drawling covers to a backing of session musicians, but I don’t suppose he cared much for convention. This is first record I ever bought (aged eight) and still sounding fresh and lively. Check out The Filth and the Fury DVD when John Lydon opens up to give a blisteringly sad account of Sid’s death.

Exodus Main Theme by Ernest Gold (L’Chaim! The Ultimate Jewish Music Collection CD) When building cathedrals early last millennium the idea was to make the constructions so huge and awe striking the peasants would have no choice but to accept the existence of God. Here that mantra is applied to music, with similarly jaw dropping consequences. That said, on sustained listening the bloated construction does get boring, so I’ll be deleting it. I went for years mistakenly thinking this music was used in The Ten Commandments.

Sugababe's latter career bears similarities to that of the Sex Pistols...

Freak Like Me by Sugababes (MP3 download) Early Sugababes and probably their best song, with wicked production by Richard X featuring the slammin’ Tubeway Army sample. After nine years of line-up changes Sugababes have, like the Sex Pistols, began to release music featuring no original members of the band.

Pistols guest vocalist Ronald Biggs alongside Friggin' writer Steve Jones

Friggin’ in the Rigging by The Sex Pistols (The Great Rock n Roll Swindle CD) I first heard Friggin in the Riggin in the early 80s and it’s always stayed with me, from vinyl to Sony Walkman to twin CD decks to MP3. Surely it is more, then, than just a set of expletives – I’ve forgotten slightly fewer of those than I’ve heard. The merging of Last Night of the Proms favourite Sea Shanty, given some “bollocks” with Steve Jones reliably attitude driven guitar apparently displays antagonism between two cultures that cannot co-exist. However, whilst  John Lydon era Pistols material may have been politically motivated, Friggin’ is, like Last Night of the Proms simple raucous fun. The demographics may be different, but musically the two genres enrich one another very merrily indeed. The lyrics are loosely based on centuries old drinking song Good Ship Venus and a major appeal may be the aforementioned expletives, however they offer an enjoyable compilation of daft stories, simple like those for children, yet visual and striking as the best children’s tales are. The fact that some words are unintelligible can make for some fun guesswork.

Also on the kitchen playlist…Hardcore Hooligans Neophyte, Hymn Stunned Guys, Jumping all over the World Scooter, Last Track of the Night DJ Promo & D-Passion, Live and Let Die Paul McCartney and Wings, My Way The Sex Pistols, No-one Is Innocent The Sex Pistols, Number 1 Fan Neophyte, Rambo Main Theme Jerry Goldsmith, Rock n Roll Swindle The Sex Pistols, Something Else The Sex Pistols , Star Trek Symphonic Suite Jerry Goldsmith, The Dreamer Lenny Dee, The Grower DJ Promo, Untouchable Girls Aloud, View to a Kill Duran Duran